Anonymous handwritten letter dated June 26, 2001
I am the mother of a 21-year-old male who was diagnosed with a serious
mental illness at 17 years. He had suffered with this illness since 5th
grade, a thought disorder that he is unable to control which includes
suicidal thoughts.
Thus started our journey. After three different facilities and uncountable
medications, different opinions, no has really said they had treated this
condition. [This condition] usually comes into view when the person is on
death row.
My son grieves over his illness. He stated that if professionals could
spend time inside him for a few seconds, they'd probably be screaming to
get out. He has been on medications that caused him to be unable to read
due to loss of vision, medications that made him more paranoid, to be
incontinent, to be unable to function. During his stay in these facilities
he gained around 70 pounds and has stretch marks worse than some women
from giving birth. Through all of this he continues to try to get better.
Out of desperation to be free of the prison his mind creates at times, he
smoked marijuana and says it is the only time he is totally free of these
thoughts. He doesn't go out to party. He seriously uses this with a couple
of other meds daily with good results. He doesn't stumble around or look
dazed. He is clear-eyed and plain spoken.
His father and I don't smoke or drink or smoke marijuana. A few years back
we would have said "No Way" will my son go out and purchase "weed." Funny
how being there can change your views. Someday I feel John will be better,
as we see improvement often, as we face his illness together. He has a
sister two years older that deals with mental illness who still hasn't
learned to cope. She turns to alcohol or whatever is thrown her way, which
has brought her close to death.
I was raised around people who drank - friends, family. And I've taken
care of end results of DWI. I've seen the death and suffering it can
cause. I've seen people of my family and community that turn to
prescription drugs.
Please help us help my son and others who need marijuana as a medical aid.
Please consider passing a bill for medical marijuana so my son and others
don't have to suffer financially and emotionally because it's illegal.
There has not to my knowledge ever been a death recorded from this drug,
but alcohol and cigarettes have killed many.
How many people out there don't seek help that are already using
marijuana? It's all over our small town and cities now and not just for
medical reasons.
I am a person who rarely takes medication. I hate what drugs, alcohol, and
cigarettes are doing to our society. But when you raise a child up with an
angel face, blonde hair, and never causing trouble and then to know what
demons he is facing, I can say there's a world out there whom we need to
address, a world of tortured minds. Many are good people with a heart for
others. If this one plant that God created for us can be used, let's not
withhold it causing undue stress and paranoid feelings for these people.